Willpower, willpower, willpower

I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework. I am not going to see Magic Mike again; I am doing homework.

100% plagiarized

I am contributing nothing to this post, because I'm pretty sure it's perfect as is. From Craigslist personals: "Dragonborn Seeks "Companion" - 27 (Skyrim) Date: 2012-06-25, 6:35PM EDT Reply to: f9ndt-3100975754@pers.craigslist.org My name is Dovahkiin, they call me Dragonborn. I am seeking a Companion for my travels. A little about myself: I am the Thane of Whiterun Arch-Mage of the College of Winterhold Guild Master of the Thieves Guild Champion of the Companions Slayer of the world-eater, Alduin If you're interested, let me know. Hope you don't get frightened away by my awesome Thu'um. FUUUUUUUUS-RO-DAH! I tell you, I tell you the Dragonborn comes." There's a picture, but I'm not going to taint my blog with it. It's a man in a mask. With horns. Does it make me a horrible person that I'm reading these personal ads just to make myself feel better? I totally should have gone to church today.

Halo effect

I'm thinking a new blog pattern could be beneficial - every time Katie L. posts, I will post. Is that incentive enough, Lulu? Ha. So I'm in the part of my diary that reflects my saintly phase. (Swallow your coffee before proceeding.) For a while in high school, definitely 10th grade but I can't remember if it went longer - not there yet in the diary! - I was very well-behaved. I didn't drink and was quite well-behaved with the menfolk. My entries from this time are not boring, though. For example, one is written in Shakespearean English. Um, I'm not sure why. Quite a few profess my undying love for someone who I was not dating, including the cliche that I might die if he did not exist. I'm relatively sure this feeling was not reciprocated, and I'm almost positively sure that my friends and I narrowly escaped restraining orders several times. The fodder for these blogs - the actual stories/events - are quite entertaining, and those of you who were with me for them hopefully still remember them and are chuckling as I am while reading this; unfortunately, I'm pretty sure I'm not going to post them on the webs of the wide world. Pretty sure.

Diary teaser

Oh geez this whole blog format changed. Hope I can figure it out, because I get the feeling I have several posts about to blossom: I found my 10th grade diary the other day. As a teaser, I will let you know that I have used the term "making love" twice in the first 5 entries. And if you think I was describing my own activities, you don't know me that well.

Reframing

I am going to teach you a valuable counseling trick. (Ok, they call it a technique, but I call it a trick.) It's basically just flipping a situation around to see the positive in it. Such as this: friend #3485950967 got engaged today, which - while good news - is just getting difficult to hear at this point if I'm being completely honest. Reframe: at this rate, pretty soon the only choice left on the single girl market will be me, so someone will HAVE to pick me.

Sigh.

Seriously, I'm happy for her, and for all of my friends getting married this year... but it does get lonely being me sometimes.

Weight a minute!

Just a minute, I promise... because weight should not take up as much of our time as it already does.

Weight issues drive me crazy for many reasons. And, yes, I at times dislike my own weight, and at times try to change it. But more than anything, I hate everyone else's complete obsession with weight! Most of you already know this, so let me skip forward to my point:

[Most, if not all] overweight people do not sit around eating fast food constantly and never leaving their couches. Some of us MAY eat fast food more than we should, and some of us MAY not be as active as we should. But I get so annoyed when my mom asks what I've been up to that day and, when I mention I went on a walk or to the gym, she acts super surprised and says something like, "Oh, are you trying to lose weight?" Um, fat people exercise. Maybe not as much as we should, but yes WE WALK. And then there are the eating questions. The other day I told a skinny coworker that her salad looked delicious, and she got a complete look of shock on her face and asked, "You eat salads??" WTF. Seriously? Of course I eat salads. Who doesn't eat salads? People are just so weird. Leave us alooooooooooooooone, weight-obsessors! We're doing just fine and have better butts than you.

A time to laugh

About an hour ago, I cried about a stupid guy. Through my tears on the phone with my best friend, I said, "One day I'm going to laugh really hard about this one, but I'm not ready to laugh about it yet."

60 MINUTES LATER: I'M READY.

This is so flipping absurd. How do I meet these freaks??

This weekend I attended wedding #2 of 2012. It was a really great time - the couple is perfect for each other, the setting was perfect for them, and a guy in the band was perfect for me. *So I thought.* Well, really, so HE thought. Midway through the wedding, a bridesmaid brought me his business card and said he was interested in getting to know me. Flattering, right? I checked him out through the crowd of dancers and found him cute. Yes, sir, you have peaked my interest. However, as cool as you know I am, I continued to just dance and hang out with my friends. After the wedding, though, he approached me as I was on my way out the door. We talked a few minutes and he got my phone number and asked if I'd like to have lunch sometime. Seemed like a normal, respectful, nice guy.

Spoiler alert: HE IS NOT.

As you might be able to tell from my lack of blogging (sorry), I'm in a busy spot right now - always having something to do for work, school, babysitting, etc. So a few days have passed, and then tonight he texted me and I gave him a call. The convo was going fine until he said, "Well there's one thing I should be honest with you: I have a girlfriend that I live with." Um, what?

Again... what?

W
h
a
t
?

As I was initially speechless, he started rambling on and on about how their relationship has been on the rocks - for about a year. Um, break up. He asked if that was a dealbreaker, to which I responded, "Well maybe not, is she cool? Would she cook us dinner or something?" Oh no wait I didn't say that I said YES OF COURSE IT IS A DEALBREAKER. Who the hell is that not a dealbreaker for? I considered hanging up on him but decided to be more polite, so after listening to him try to tell me why it would be okay to still "just get to know each other" (hello I have no time for that when I'm already 95% certain from this suggestion that you are a psycho), I said, "Well you have my number, so once you stop being confused and work out your issues, give me a call then"... to which he laughed and said he is not confused. Ok, let me rephrase... I know this situation is not confusing to you because you are having your cake and eating it too... what I'm confused about is why the hell you think I want to go on a date with you.

So yeah, I'm ready to laugh about this one now. Even though in the back of my mind it is making me wonder if I really am going to be single forever.